Thursday, January 26, 2012

Featured Article: Where Have All the Nice-Looking People Gone?
by Judith Rasband, AICI CIM  www.Conselle.com
Beth Y. Stange AICI CIP is a Licensed Conselle Affiliate
Photo: maurilioamorim.com
They've gone the way of their nice-looking clothes! Most are just plain gone! Many people look pretty awful in today's casual, uniform dress-ill-fitting jeans and T-shirts! And I'm no longer alone in stating this observation. The idea that dressing down has gone too far has been gaining concern, say those who engage in people watching as a profession.
Photo: chaosmanorreviews.com
Betty Halbreich, author of Secrets Of A Fashion Therapist, was asked, "How do you think women are dressing today?" She answered in alarm, "They look awful! People, both men and women, have become very sloppy. We're just too casual." Referring to Casual Friday she added, "It should be blown off the map! It's become so casual . . . they're coming to work in their pajamas." Even cartoon character, Dilbert, agrees. "I love the 'Business Casual' looks for the way it combines unattractive with unprofessional while diminishing neither."
It's interesting to do a little people watching for yourself. Sitting in a wonderful, well designed and well decorated office building I made a few notes. So many employees looked so out of place wearing faded cotton polo shirts and khakis or jeans. I was shocked at seeing women who looked like they just came in from the farm--followed by full-figured women, invariably the ones to wear a short top, leggings, and hiking boots or pointy-toed-heels. And so many men were wearing a knit or ill-fitting shirt and pants, the focal point becomes their belly. "Why bother with the cost of a beautiful building when the people inside look so awful!" declared another observer.
Photo: DailyMail
People may want a more relaxed, casual attitude and behavior, therefore the casual image. But why go to the point where we compromise our integrity, lose our dignity, and look like a slob? Wendy Cheslea, Canadian image management consultant, reports, "People look terrible. They just don't care how they look! They'll spend $10 on a tacky T-shirt and call themselves dressed. They spend their money on boats, cars, and other toys but not on their clothes! When did this happen?" asks Cheslea. "Where is it leading? And what can we do about it?"
Since the 60s and the attitude of "down with the establishment," traditional ways of dress have been giving way to more casual dress on all occasions. It's part of the casualization of America. And Canada is right on our heels. "People have become lazy", asserts Halbreich. "People don't want to have to think about what goes with what. Jeans and a T-shirt is a no-brainer. And that's what the people look like-like they don't have a brain."
"I don't have to worry about looking nice anymore," declared a frumpy looking woman. "Don't worry," chimed in Cheslea, "you don't." "It doesn't matter what I wear," stated a disgruntled consumer at the thought of image improvement. "I don't have to impress anyone." And again, adds Cheslea, "Don't worry, you won't." According to a recent Harvard University study, productivity on casual Fridays has dropped 30 percent. Citibank reversed earlier casual dress policies, claiming that "chains of command had broken down, productivity was sagging and chaos reigned in the workplace."
Photo: middlesexcc.edu
So it does matter. We know that the way we choose to look affects the way we think, the way we feel, the way we act or behave, and only then the way others react or respond to us--all of this affecting the achievement of our goals--or not. I talk with so many who tell me about feeling depressed. We can lift that load by simply getting up and dressing up to some degree. A colored shirt with a collar does wonders to lift your look and your mood.
For those who do still dare to dress nicely, we find that someone in casual to sloppy dress is sure to challenge them with a sneer, saying "Why you so dressed up?" Even youngsters are known to censure nicely dressed classmates with comments like, "Who do you think you are, Miss Priss?" The questions are crafted to put you down and make you feel like the one who is out of place, while they build themselves up-and it's working.
In this post-modern day we are allowing people to take the liberty of taking away the right to look nice, to dress to a higher level. Additional reports are typical, of people being told not to come to work in "good clothes anymore. You make the rest of us feel uncomfortable." Or, "No one dresses up for the theater anymore, so don't bother." It has become the accepted assumption that it is the nicely presented person who must make the change, the one who must conform to lower standards.
You, we, and our youth need some one liners already in our heads, ready for response, allowing us to more easily stand for higher standards. You need to stand or walk tall, smile politely, and say something like, "Because it makes me feel so nice." Other one liners to consider include:
  • "'Cause I'm worth it."
  • "'Cause I know better."
  • "Today's a special day."
  • "Because I respect myself."
  • "So I get and keep the job."
  • "Because I'm nicer to look at."
  • "I like the way it makes me feel."
  • "So you'll notice me--and you did."
Photo: JNY.com
Turn the question and the pressure around. Practice saying, "Why are you so dressed down?"
Chances are the person will likely come back with something like, "Cause it's more comfortable." To which you can add, "I'm both comfortable and lookin' so good."
Someone might easily say, "'Cause it's in fashion." And so you ask, "Why is it in fashion? Who's driving the fashion?" While there are fine and responsible fashion manufacturers and retailers "out there," there are also disreputable and irresponsible fashion Moguls and media that present rude and crude images for shock value-to attract attention, viewers, readers, and buyers of what they want to sell-be it attitudes, behaviors, or products. Giving into that sort of fashion, you become a "fashion victim."
Well, I want none of my readers to fall victim to fashion. We can take action in the form of image management. If we are not already looking and feeling the way we want to look and feel, again I say, it's never too late to become who we want to be. Make 2012 the year you get yourself and your wardrobe the way you've always wanted them to be. 
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